In pt. 2 of this News on News special, we learned all abt Ziz's "hardline" ideas, speculated on lentil glossolalia, & reasserted that unusual beliefs are neither a crime, nor a guaranteed slippery slope into violence!
We followed the Globe trio's wanderings hither & thither in pursuit of this tangled tale, & sighed many a wistful sigh over how ferociously our once-beloved Boston Globe dislikes an ideological "fringe". In a spirit of generosity, we workshopped their most close-minded & suspicious line to date, then admired their use of the word "gothic" to describe our descent into- little do they know- Rationalism Gothic!
The trio are elsewhere, in Rationalism Bizarroland: where the Rationalists always work hard to dispense w/ démodé beliefs, where they pride themselves on inclusivity, & where none of Ziz's personal characteristics drew any ire whatsoever!
That mesmeric Ziz again loomed up in front of us, & foolishly stumbled into the mode of comportment which the Globe loathes most: staging a public protest! So tacky! The trio then revealed themselves as postmodern auteurs du cinéma, by which we mean they jumped from 2019 aaaaall the way to 2022 w/ nary a mention of '19's Great Witch-Hunt. We trembled as they ventured inside Alice's & Jamie's old apartment, noted that, in Rationalism Bizarroland, A & J are "roommates", & wagged our finger at the Globe's sly omission of Alice's crimes & fascist offenses.
We, in the bowels of Rationalism Bizarroland, had begun to doubt whether we'd ever see sunlight again- until our gf interrupted us to go to the farmers' market! Many delicious fruits, indeed, were eaten.
Last time saw our trio of Globe reporters leading us into a paper bag, when they had promised us Zizians! Where are the Zizians?
Well, before we find any of them, we find one of our all-time fav phrases:
Poor Ophelia is, needless to say, the next to be deadnamed, and immediately re-deadnamed in a fresh new way— at least, it would be fresh had we not seen it in countless articles to date: we refer ofc to the dread “[Redacted] ‘Ophelia’ Bauckholt”. The trio then shows us that they have read (or at least read the usernames of) everybody’s blogs!
They call their online personas “vibrant”— v. sweet— but then, we fear, fatally undermine their own engagement w/ this vital source material by divvying it into “debates on rationality” (which they seem to take no issue with), & “tales of personal drama (TOPD)” (which they pooh-pooh & set aside).
Little do they know, these TOPD blow— in our opinion— the lid right off this case. By TOPD, they are ofc referring to the vile & virulent transphobia of the Rationalists; to Jamie’s childhood abuse; to the great witch-hunt of 2019; to the hair-raising crimes of Alice; etc. etc.
Unfortunately for us, their readers, it is within these TOPD that the “Zizians” truly reside. It is thru these TOPD that we learn of them as people. It is thru these TOPD that their “vibrant” perspectives shine.
It is thru disdaining these TOPD that we have, so far, gone nowhere w/ this trio but “Inside” of a haunted house show, where Rationalists have projected scary shadows on the wall, & passed their phantasmagoria off to the trio— who have passed it along to us— as real, live “Zizians”.
*****
Next:
To hear our soliloquy on scary shadows & how they have deepened our understanding of that devious SOTTV*: Almost Human, but not Quite
To get on w/ our Globe journey: Constantly Saying Wackadoo Things