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In pt. 1 of our News on News special, we met Matt Osborne: a bunny & graveyard enthusiast who has penned, for his 6k Substack subscribers, the exciting headline: “How the Media Picks the Pronouns…”
How indeed? How could the media be so disgracefully démodé as to pick, at every conceivable opportunity, the wrong Zizian pronouns? Thrilled to hear Matt’s response, we hustled him under the bright lights of Strange New Vegan Death Cult Murders HQ, only to see, peeking out from the shadows, the rest of his headline: “How The Media Picks The Pronouns Of Zizians Trans Vegan Death Cult Members, And ignores the role of transgender ideology in the cult” 🫢
We learned that Matt has a propensity for whimsy— that is, for thinking transness will vanish like Tinker Bell so long as he doesn’t believe in it— & then our phone dinged to remind us: 😮 it’s crit day!
We had some compliments for Matt: his best phrase sounded, according to Chat, like a “possibly queer, punk, or working-class” zine artiste! & we saw room for growth in a few of his paragraphs where he asked the essential question: “Do the Zizians display fanaticism?”
Along the way, we learned that the median western recruit to the Islamic State is endearingly hard to pigeon-hole, & mused over moderate vagrants. Finally, we delivered Matt his open-faced, Scandinavian-style compliment sandwich, & retired to the Green Room to drink a Red Bull & powder our nose.
***
You next, Matt, say sthng that makes us think. You say:
News organizations that do address the ideology of the Zizians [by which you mean their transness] mention they are vegan.
This makes us nod & ponder. Not bc it’s a trend that we’ve seen in the news— we’ve not yet seen the news using veganism as a gloss for transness— but bc it’s a fine observation abt one of our non-Zizian fav subjects: the absurdities of queer life in 20th-century America.
This is a bit of a detour, but we’re feeling indulgent (FI). If you, dear readers, are not FI, by all means skip ahead to the next “***” break.
If we could put Mz. Ziz in a time machine, & zap her back several decades— well, ppl might not know what “veganism” was, but we can joyfully imagine “News organizations that do address [her queer identity] mention[ing]”:
• “She has an unusual interest in the arts.”
• “She’s quite the free spirit.”
• “She’s a little too fond of the theater.”
• “She’s very independent for a woman.”
• “She has a lot of admirers, but never seems to settle down.” Or: “She’s a bit of a mystery to the men around here.”
• “She’s very modern”
• “She’s been to Paris.”
🥲 Anyway, back to you, Matt.
***
Next you 🥱 misattribute Gwen’s hemisphere theory to Ziz— Gwen hates that!— but win back our interest w/ this phrase:
As we shall see, reporters never ask whether there is anything extreme about transgenderism itself that may have misled young people to adopt other extreme views.
Reveal your sources, Matt! We have been looking high & low for such considerate reportage, & have found v. little!
We, for our part, have found you many, many examples of reporters asking whether there is something extreme abt trans identity which may act as a pipeline to “extreme views” writ large! Has there been a switcheroo? Is our longed-for coverage going to Matt & vice versa? Matt, pls review our News on News section for what you want to see, & ofc, forward us your saved articles ASAP, bc your next statement similarly confounds us:
All but a handful report on LaSota with female pronouns.
This is not so! Again, pls refer to News on News here for a refreshing array of misgendery. We have saved it all for you. Why does the news insist on misgendering poor Ziz? We think it’s bc they’re transphobic, but you have a different opinion:
The reason, as we have observed in our tracking coverage of this story, is that LaSota had a blog.
***
First, Matt, we are thrilled to find yet another arena where we are simpatico, where we are indeed— if we may be so bold— frenemies. We love your royal “we”. It is a well-chosen pronoun, & we extend to you our invitation to talk shop abt it anytime.
Second: what in god’s name are you talking abt? Surely, Matt, there are trans ppl who do not blog, & whom the media still genders correctly? Does Laverne Cox blog? Does Kim Petras blog? Does the mainstream media still, in general, extend respect to Laverne & Kim? Yes!
Next you say another strange thing:
For those of us who deplored the advent of ‘legal sex’ and ‘passport sex,’ it is time to add ‘blog sex’ to the list of abominations.
Did you “deplore” the advents of “legal” & “passport sex”? That’s a big thing to feel sorrow over, bc every U.S. citizen— fortunately or unfortunately— has an officially-recorded sex marker (ORSM), & what you call “passport sex” is just that ORSM applied to 1 specific document.
ORSMs have been with us since ancient times— but have really been with us since the rise of the nation state in the 18th-19th c., where they have been closely tied to state power, medicalization & surveillance! In this sense, Matt, we too deplore the advent of ORSMs. We again extend an open invitation— to drop by anytime for a chat on bold, ORSM-free futures.
Finally, we love your phrase, “it is time to add ‘blog sex’ to the list of abominations”. There is a kind of slant alliteration b/w “blo-" & “abo-", & there is a delightful contrast b/w the biblical weight of “abominations”— & the triviality of “blog sex”. You, Mr. Matt, have a way w/ words 😉
***
Next you dig into Gwen, or “Gwen”, as you call her. Gwen is— for us & for you— the favorite of this whole story.
You misgender your favorite, but you also call her “A transgender Washington state native”, which is nice: you could have said “a Washington state native who believes in transgenderism”, but you refrained. Next you surprise us again by calling Ziz “her”! You are showing us yr softer side, & we appreciate it.
You persist in asserting that “No one else in the transgender vegan death cult gets wrong-sex pronouns”— by which, from context, we think you mean, “Gwen & Ziz get the right pronouns; no one else does”. In fact, no one in this cabal has escaped the media machine w/ pronouns consistently respected. We again refer you to the News on News for many juicy examples. You then come to the heart of your argument— your argument for “How The Media Picks The Pronouns Of Zizians Trans Vegan Death Cult Members”:
At times, the gender-neutral “they/them” are applied, but only LaSota and Danielson, the two bloggers who wrote at length about their transgender nature and its effects on their genius, get to have wrong-sex pronouns.
Putting aside the fact that “they/them” is used most frequently to refer to Mz. Ziz in the articles we’ve reviewed— & is, incidentally, not often used for the nonbinary members of Mz. Ziz’s friend-group… we enjoy 2 things abt your phrase, “their transgender nature and its effects on their genius”.
1. This implies you think they have “genius”, & altho we have a bingo category called “😱 Geniuses?” & roll our eyes at the media’s stupefaction over “smart kids getting into a mess like this”… what you have said is rlly quite sweet. We again commend you for showing us the softer, cuddlier Matt.
2. “their transgender nature” is a striking thing to say. It brings us aaall the way back to when we were giggling over “having blue eyes” vs. “blueeyedism”. Here you are using “transgender” as an adjective— like “blue-eyed”— & we once more thank you. We have never heard the phrase “someone’s transgender nature” used before: you could have said sthng prosaic like “their transness”, but you didn’t, & that’s refreshing. “Their ____ nature” is a romantic way to describe someone: “their fiery nature”; “their serious nature”; even, if you were writing sci-fi, “their alien nature”. We like it!
As for the substance of your statement— that both Gwen & Ziz blogged extensively on how being trans makes them smarter… this is untrue.
***
If you want to get into the nitty-gritty of it— the girls, ca. 2019, did seem to believe that being trans gives one an edge in developing novel mental tech, but there are 3 ways to interpret this:
a) This is an unfortunate case of essentializing-from-within: it appears to be a nice thing to say, but, on closer inspection, rests on the not-so-nice assumption that “all trans ppl are the same”.
b) This is an empowering way to assert their worthiness in a context which refused them chances to prove that worthiness, & which claimed that being trans meant their thinking was faulty.
c) This is a generalization based on a neutral & reasonable-seeming observation: many trans ppl, according to them, are unusually interested in the workings of the mind (IITWOTM). Being IITWOTM, according to them, gives one an edge in mental tech development.
🤷🏻♀️ There are many possibilities! However: you are wrong to say that any of these possibilities were a major topic on their blogs.
***
Next comes the best line in your entire article:
[Jamie] Zajko’s parents, Richard and Rita Zajko, could not be reached for comment because they are dead.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Who tried to reach them for comment (TRTFC)? Did you try TRTFC? You are not a journalist! You, altho you call yourself a “Media & News Company” on X are, so far as we can tell, a glorified blogger— you are again, in that sense, no different than us. You wear many hats— so do we. Your hats include:
• Self-declared expert on a 17th-century English Royalist, on whom we could find almost no information;
• Self-declared historian on, among other things, “Losing the Confederate Cause” (we hope you mean that it was lost for the best!)
• Owner of your own magazine— we love independent media, but your magazine, Matt, describes itself as:
• You also write “reviews” for an “international alliance” which seems mainly to push for ppl to detransition, & to further misinformation abt HRT!
We take back what we said 🥲 You, Matt, are exactly the type of person who would call up the Zajkos & ask for their comment on this fiasco.
***
Matt, if we may speak to you scribe-to-scribe: the act of composition (TAOC) is not unlike performing a high-stakes gymnastics routine (AHSGR).
Like AHSGR, TAOC stretches our coordination & our instinct for timing to the limits. It rewards big risks, but requires precision! Don’t we know what it’s like: you expect to be twirling thru the air, but end up flat on your back on the dusty mat 😮💨 You, Mr. Matt, in this phase of yr routine on the bars, picked up a few deductions.
First you say:
Despite transgenderism being a core belief of the group, the press is not going out of its way to award wrong-sex pronouns (by which you mean right pronouns).
Then you say:
News reports use male pronouns for [Somni], who apparently does identify [herself] as a transgender person. What gives?
& then you make us laugh when you pout:
[Ophelia] Bauckholt is awarded posthumous pronouns.
Make up your mind, Mr. Matt! Is the press (ITP) going out of its way to right-pronoun Gwen & Ziz, or aren’t they? Are you happy that Somni’s getting wrong-pronouned or aren’t you? ITP withholding poor Ophelia’s pronouns, or doling them out? You are weeble-wobbling, & might need a sandwich— as might yr weary audience 😋
*****
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